dreaming. thinking.
I've been having some strange dreams lately. A coupla nights ago, I dreamt about a wedding. It was in a really large hall. Hundreds of people. I don't know who was getting married. I think my kids were in the wedding, as young kids - not as they are now. It was only inferred, but I know that I was concerned about them walking the aisle and all. But, what stands out most was the white haired, bearded, cigarette smoking rabbi who was officiating the ceremony. Huh?! I'm not sure what THAT was supposed to represent.... ideas??
Last night, though, I dreamt about Mom. We were in some faraway, unnamed country. We traveled there together, but right at the beginning of the dream she had to leave. She left before I did, and left me alone not knowing how to get home. In my dream I remember explaining to somebody that she didn't mean to leave me so soon and that I was sure she had good reason and would explain it to me later. Pretty obvious, I think. Leaving me too soon. . . leaving me to muddle through without her. sighh... I really miss her.
My dream then continued on with me being lost in a strange land. The most common thread in my dreams is that I'm lost, trying to find my way back to where I should be. That's the plot of most of my dreams. Different people and places, but I usually somehow get lost and spend the rest of the dream unsuccessfully making my way back.
Life is a series of stressors these days. We all have stress in our lives. It's how we deal with it that makes the difference. I've got to learn to deal....not doing a good job at it. I worry about my kids, first and foremost. Lots of good reasons why. My job is stressful right now. My job, where I've always been content and felt comfy. My doctor appointment is looming...just a few weeks away. I start to fret a bit as it gets closer. I spend so much of my time thinking. Dreaming about the Way it Should Be. Or will be. My mind is on overload, overthinker that I am. I'm grateful that I can usually sleep at night.
I need to make a list. Things Gayle Should Do To Improve Her Outlook Thereby Improving Her Life.
maybe tomorrow....
Last night, though, I dreamt about Mom. We were in some faraway, unnamed country. We traveled there together, but right at the beginning of the dream she had to leave. She left before I did, and left me alone not knowing how to get home. In my dream I remember explaining to somebody that she didn't mean to leave me so soon and that I was sure she had good reason and would explain it to me later. Pretty obvious, I think. Leaving me too soon. . . leaving me to muddle through without her. sighh... I really miss her.
My dream then continued on with me being lost in a strange land. The most common thread in my dreams is that I'm lost, trying to find my way back to where I should be. That's the plot of most of my dreams. Different people and places, but I usually somehow get lost and spend the rest of the dream unsuccessfully making my way back.
Life is a series of stressors these days. We all have stress in our lives. It's how we deal with it that makes the difference. I've got to learn to deal....not doing a good job at it. I worry about my kids, first and foremost. Lots of good reasons why. My job is stressful right now. My job, where I've always been content and felt comfy. My doctor appointment is looming...just a few weeks away. I start to fret a bit as it gets closer. I spend so much of my time thinking. Dreaming about the Way it Should Be. Or will be. My mind is on overload, overthinker that I am. I'm grateful that I can usually sleep at night.
I need to make a list. Things Gayle Should Do To Improve Her Outlook Thereby Improving Her Life.
maybe tomorrow....
posted by Anonymous G | 8:49 PM
2 Comments:
Cool picture.
And I miss my mom, too.
Mother's Day is creeping up. I'm thinkin' it's okay that we miss our moms, ya know?
(((((((((((G)))))))))))))))
BJ has been dreaming about his dad lately, too. He can't quite grasp what it's supposed to signify. The common theme is that he's not doing something the way his dad wants him to. Weird.
I love that picture, and it shows that you're able to see lots of beauty around you, even though you're having a series of stressors.
I'm going to think good thoughts for your doctors appointment. I'm thinking you've had enough crap in your life and it's time you move on to the good stuff.
xoxo
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