amazing grace

Graduation day has come and gone. It was a lovely ceremony with a bagpipe band and speeches and beach balls. Yes, beach balls. The graduates are stripped of all their worldly goods when they don their caps and gowns. Oh, the horrors! No cell phones. ANYway, every year some students manage to sneak in a beach ball or two to blow up and toss around during the ceremony. A little extra levity and a final prank as they say goodbye to high school and life as they knew it.

Her dad wasn't there, but Don and her brother and I were there to cheer her on. It was a tough day for her and I am so proud of her. She made it. Shining and beautiful! The day was bittersweet and filled with so much heartache.

...sighhh...

Decisions are being made and hearts and feelings are being tugged on and pulled and stretched to the limits. We, as a family, are going through some tough times right now.

I really have no control over my kids and their decisions, yet I continue to try to fix things. I try to make everyone happy. I continue to show my love and offer some wisdom through experience hoping to turn the lights on in their heads. I can't give it up. I know at some point, probably right about now, I have to realize my kids' lives are their own. It's time I realize that it's not up to me anymore to make their decisions, to show them the way. I just can't give it up. I know they need me and my guidance. They DO still come to me for advice, support, love... I am their confidant and advisor.

I can see the mistakes they're making and can see myself and the mistakes I've made. It tears me up inside to see them making these choices. I didn't have the guidance they have. I'm hoping and praying they'll learn and grow and realize what's good and true. All I can do is what I do best. Love them.